Triumph Over Triggers: Finding Hope in the Midst of Pain

Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. The reminders have been everywhere, from store displays to social media posts. But for many, this season is not a celebration of love; it is a painful reminder of loss, rejection, and unmet expectations.

If you find yourself struggling with emotional triggers, you are not alone. Triggers are powerful, unexpected moments that stir deep emotions, often tied to past experiences. They can catch us off guard, bringing a wave of grief, sadness, or even bitterness. However, as daughters of God, we do not have to be overcome by them. Instead, we can learn to triumph over our triggers with His truth, grace, and love.

What Are Triggers?

A trigger is anything that causes an emotional, psychological, or even physical reaction. It can be tied to past trauma, grief, or deep emotions. Triggers come in many forms, often connected to our five senses:

• Sight – Seeing someone who resembles a lost loved one or an old memory can bring an unexpected emotional wave.
• Sound – A song can stir emotions, whether comforting or painful. Conversations or phrases can remind us of painful experiences, resurfacing deep wounds.
• Scent – Fragrances can bring back memories of a person or moment, evoking joy or sorrow.
• Taste – Comfort foods can transport us to a past experience, sometimes bringing warmth, other times grief.
• Touch – the lack of, longing for, or watching others find comfort in the embrace of another can bring about a tender flashback.

The days leading up to a significant date or holiday can also trigger emotions—sometimes even more than the day itself. Anticipation can stir up anxiety, loneliness, or sadness, making it difficult to move forward.

Biblical Encouragement for the Triggered Heart

While the word “trigger” is not in the Bible, the concept of stumbling blocks, remembrance, and temptations is frequently mentioned. God knew we would struggle with difficult memories and emotions, and His Word provides both comfort and guidance.

One of the most powerful examples of God’s tender care in painful moments is found in Hagar’s story (Genesis 16). Fleeing from rejection and mistreatment, Hagar found herself alone in the wilderness. It was in that place of despair that God met her, called her by name, and gave her a promise. She responded by calling Him El Roi, “The God who sees me.”

Another example is Leah’s story (Genesis 29-31). Leah faced deep rejection in her marriage, longing for the love of her husband, Jacob. Yet, despite being overlooked by man, she was seen, loved, and blessed by God. Through her sons, she eventually shifted her focus from seeking human approval to finding joy in the Lord. Her son, Judah—whose name means “I will praise the Lord”—became the ancestor of Jesus Christ. What a beautiful reminder that God brings significance out of our suffering.

How to Triumph Over Triggers

Instead of allowing triggers to control us, we can take steps to navigate them with faith and hope. Here are four ways to triumph over triggers:

Anticipate them.

If you know a certain time of year or situation might be difficult, prepare your heart. Acknowledge that triggers may come, and ask God for strength to face them with grace. The enemy often uses triggers as surprise attacks, but we can be proactive in guarding our hearts.

Validate the pain, but don’t make it your identity.

Pain is real, and it is okay to acknowledge it. However, we must be careful not to make our triggers part of our identity. Do not let past wounds define your present or future.

Plan a way of escape.

Sometimes, creating new traditions can help us replace painful memories with joyful ones. If a holiday or date is difficult, consider:

• Host a Galentine’s gathering—an opportunity to celebrate friendships and God’s love.
• Create a progressive dinner tradition with family or friends to build new, joyful memories.
• Finding meaningful ways to honor your loved one’s memory in a life-giving way.

Redirect Your Focus

When a trigger comes—whether expected or unexpected—shift your focus to God’s truth. The enemy wants us to dwell in self-pity, but God calls us to walk in victory. Hold on to His promises:

• “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness” (Jeremiah 31:3).
• “I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine” (Isaiah 43:1).
• “God rescued us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the Kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins” (Colossians 1:13-14).

You Are God’s Valentine

You are treasured. You are deeply loved by God. He sees every wound, every painful memory, and every longing of your heart. His love is unwavering, and His plans for you are good.

If this season is difficult for you, know that you are not alone. God is holding you close, guiding you through the pain, and redeeming your story. Triggers may come, but they do not have to define you. You can triumph over them with God’s strength and walk in His perfect love.